Happy 2nd Year Anniversary To Me

Today marks the second year since I started blogging on WordPress. Happy anniversary to me! 😊

I remember when I started blogging. I was all excited about finally being a ‘blogger'(you know that prestige that comes with being a blogger! When you tell people, they imagine you are like Linda Ikeji or something close to that). That was what I thought.

2015 was a good blogging year for me notwithstanding that I was very inconsistent with making posts.

2016 was better. I made friends with some other bloggers, wrote quite more than I did in the previous year and made impact (this is what I live for). I even got an award from my church’s youth arm for being a blogger… “Dynamic Icon of the year”.

2017 started on a good note. Until all the responsibilities creeped in, weighed me out. Until my phone got lost, and I seemed to lose my muse.

I’ve been battling with what to post on this platform. I don’t wanna write just for writing sake.

I wanted to do a review on Ugwu Arese’s The Smart money woman (You all should read that book). I probably will still do a review on it.

I wanted to write about the bike man who carried me and was lecturing me on the importance of having a traditional marriage. In his words, “tell your father that a bike man told you that traditional marriage is something you cannot skip as an Ibo girl”. Yes. He was an Ibo man.

I really don’t fancy the idea of having to go to the village all because of a traditional marriage. I mean, my father’s house is in Lagos. So why the stress? Apart from my grandmother and her other two children there, who else do I know there? It’s just ridiculous for someone to suggesy that it is impossible for me to have my traditional marriage in my father’s house. But I smiled anyways and concluded within myself that I’d rather not have a traditional wedding at all.

I guess in some way I’ve blogged about it after all.

I wanted to blog about something I just noticed. In selecting a table to sit at in a cafeteria where the spaces are almost occupied, people(myself being an example) usually select tables with either familiar faces or faces that appear friendly and appealing to them. I was in the cafeteria the other day and noticed how a girl who had just ordered her meal scanned through the faces of people before she picked her seat. Sadly, it was not beside me.

Anyways, now that I have gotten all these out on this post, I feel an anniversary tea party for myself and by myself is in order.

I am part of the organisers planning an event on tax awareness set to hold this Friday (two days from now). I am stressed out from planning. Maybe I’ll do a post on planning events and what it entails.

Cheers to a second year anniversary. I see progress occuring on and with this blog. May the third year be far better.

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Much ado about this feminism

I like to think that I am a feminist. I converted from being a traditionalist to being a feminist, two years ago, when I first encountered the ideology. I have continuously spoken in favour of the topic- feminism, written a few articles in favour of it as well as had numerous arguments to support the course. However, as much I like to think of myself as a feminist, this article will be tackling the weaknesses or gaps.

I was talking with a group of people recently and one of them, a guy, made a statement about feminists or females in general that I quite agree with and feel is a problem that should be tackled if the goal of feminism- gender equality- is to be achieved.

He said and I quote

Women. When it comes to opportunities, you seek to be given preference. But in the face of responsibility, you push that to the guys.

And that is actually not a lie. The fact that it is true bothers me a whole lot.

To this end, I made a resolution- one I had made before- to ensure I don’t fall into that category of women who want opportunities and deny responsibilities.

However, most guys and their inflated egos would not allow a girl ever foot their bill. They cling to the responsibility like it is their trophy. Perhaps, it is a trophy.

I believe in gender equality so much that I cannot even strictly criticize the concept. However, i think many people are misusing feminism. Some are radicals and are creating societal problems with their radical ideology. Others have only used feminism as a shield to enjoy privileges and then returned to the cultural norm to evade responsibilities- financial responsibilities.

There’s so much we can do to achieve gender equality. Although, I think we have a long way to go to achieve it. Maybe I should stop claiming feminist. Maybe I should just tag myself a believer in ‘gender equality’.

There’s so much ruckus on feminism and the dividing line needs to be drawn.

What do you think ?

The Gods Have Had Their Way With Us

Hi.

Overcoming the several, unfinished posts syndrome,

I have decided to post a poem I wrote a while ago before my phone went bad.

I hope you enjoy this poem.

The gods have had their way with us

Yesterday,
We were both lovers
Enthralled in Cupid’s game
Ensnared in his trap
We wrapped our bodies around each other
We promised each other heaven on earth-
A forever,
Something everlasting
But the gods had their ways with us
And now Obim
You are gone to meet with Chi
We cannot have together forever anymore.
I regret I didn’t write you a poem
Before you left.
The gods sure have a terrible way
Of showing their regard
For our love.

But Obim
I promise you
That I’d treasure the memories
You made with me
Those we made together,
Of dancing under moonlit skies
During moonlight festivals,
Of watching the Mmuo
Even though females were not supposed to be out
How you gave me your clothes to disguise
And held my hands past all the masquerades
As they paraded.

Of our spot,
The dull garden
Behind the Ube tree
That belonged to Mazi Ibe
And how you always joked with the rhyme

His name made with the fruit
Ube Mazi Ibe
I laugh now.

Obim
I would have followed you
To meet with the gods
And queried their inconsideration
But I am with child
Yes! Your seed has sprouted a baby
I was to tell you yesterday
But sought to do it in a romantic way
Thinking we had all the years ahead
The gods have had their way
But with this child,
We yet still have our way.
Watch over us Obim
I love you forever.

©Opara Chizaram Adaobi

The highlighted words are Igbo words and their meanings are:

Obim- My love, My heart

Mmuo- Masquerade( believed to be spirit beings)

Ube- (small pear)

Mazi Ibe- Mr Ibe( Ibe is an Igbo name)

Happy Independence

Happy new month and happy independence day to my Nigerian readers.

In the course of celebrating the 57th anniversary of our independence from the British colonial masters, I can’t help but reflect on the influence the Britons had on us, that is still left with us. Things like Western education, western dressing, the use of English language and so many others are examples of this influence.

My focus today is however on the use of English language. I was on twitter just this morning and one of my followers posted something about how he just discovered that “trafficate”, a commonly used supposedly English word in Nigeria, is not a word.

I googled it and actually found from search results, that it is a word coined by Nigerians.

I wonder how we went from having the Englishmen leaving their legacy of English language with us to developing our own form of English language, “Nigerian English”.

On Nairaland, I found an article that I will love to share with you guys.

Many people speak English as their first language. It is one of the most commonly
spoken languages in the world.

Nigerians are very good at a number of things and one of them is inventing their own version of English which has become popular overtime.

Some of the words and phrase we use often cannot be found in the dictionary. Some are
words you picked up from others and they have become quite a norm. It is not only the uneducated folks that are guilty of using these wrong words as the very educated Nigerians also use the English language inappropriately.

Below are words Nigerians use that doesn’t exist in the English dictionary.

1. Go-slow: When Nigerians say go-slow, they mean congested traffic, which is wrong. The meaning of go-slow in the English dictionary is, a form of industrial action in which work or progress is deliberately delayed or slowed
down.

2. Disvirgin: This word is used on a daily basis by many Nigerians when they intend to say a woman has lost her virginity. There is no word like disvirgin. The correct word to use is deflower. Disvirgin simply does not exist.

3. Trafigate: Nigerians use the word to describe a situation where a driver indicates to other drivers that he/she wants to take a turn. It is used so often, that it has started to sound like proper English.

4. Flashing: Every Nigerian knows “flashing” to mean when someone calls your mobile phone and cuts off before you answer. The word ‘flash’ is so common among Nigerians and its used at least once daily by many. Flash has different meanings but none has anything to do with a phone call. The word doesn’t exist in that sense in English.

5. Installmentally: Don’t be tempted to use the word ‘installmentally’. Though it soundscorrect, it isn’t. There is no such word in the English dictionary as it only exists only in the Nigerian edition of English language. The correct thing to say is ‘in installments’.

6. Opportuned: What exists in English dictionaries is ‘opportune,’ without ‘d’ at the
end. Opportune means ‘timely’ or ‘well-time, especially convenient or appropriate for a
particular action or event. Opportuned is only common in Nigerian English.

7. Cunny: This is a word which Nigerians use to describe someone that is being deceitful or crafty. The right word is cunning not cunny.

8. Next tomorrow: Most Nigerians generally use “next tomorrow” but there is not suchword as next tomorrow. Instead you should say, “a day after tomorrow”.

9. Packer: Nigerians probably got the word from pack. The right word is dustpan. Sincedustpan packs dirt, Nigerians like to call it packer.

10. Pepperish: It is common to hear Nigerians describe a meal that has too much pepper in it as pepperish. The proper word should be ‘peppery’. No native English speaker uses the word pepperish” to describe the burning sensation we feel from eating pepper.

 So, my Nigerian people, even as we celebrate independence, let us begin to learn the right use of English words and extol this legacy left with us.

PS: Nigeria’s Independence day was yesterday, 1st October.

LIFE HAPPENS

As I sit and type this, I am undecided as to what greetings to start with. I know I can be pretty predictable and go with the ‘Hi! Hey! Hello!’. But I don’t want to. But then again, since I am normally a quite patterned and predictable person, I do not know of any catchy and unconventional way to begin. And so, I have settled for this; “the-tell-your-woe-story” to me kind of beginning.

Anyways, I have been off radar and it is becoming such a habit; I guess some of you guys didn’t even notice. I don’t exactly feel up to telling my catch up story.But let me do a summary catch up. I have been through a spoilt phone, lost purse, swollen face…and now my head is jammed with thoughts.

A SPOILT PHONE

Never before I started typing up this post, did I imagine I’d end up blogging about my phone getting spoilt. Anyone who knows me knows I am was addicted to my phone. I practically have had all of my life going on, on that small device. My phone developed a sudden fault and went off on its own, choosing to never come back alive. After being worked on by a phone engineer, it was diagnosed irreparable. And so, I was forced to get a torchlight phone. It was traumatic really. And till date, I have been phoneless (practically). And that’s all about my phone situation. I look forward to getting a new phone but for now, I am making do with the one I have.

THE LOST PURSE

This one was very annoying. December last year, I lost my purse by leaving it in a cab. The purse contained about 10k, my bank ATM card and my University’s central library card (till date I haven’t replaced it). I felt bad but was thankful that I didn’t lose any of my ID cards. However, just last week, the same event repeated itself. I forgot my purse in a cab on arriving Ibadan. I was hurt as all the money I had on me was in it, my ID cards, my ATM cards, hostel ID cards and my room key were in it. It felt as though things could only get worse for me. I couldn’t call home to report that I had lost my purse since I had already lost one previously and didn’t want to be seen as careless and all. So, I strived to bear my burden myself but God brought angels my way to help me. He brought people who helped me out of the situation. I only just collected my new ATM card and I am yet still “purseless”(If that’s a thing). I even made a resolve never to use a purse again.

SWOLLEN FACE

Have you ever had an allergic reaction? Seen one before?

Prior to Sunday this week, I would have said a big NO. But it so happened that I woke up on Sunday morning, feeling heavy on my face. I ignored it for a sleepy face. It was not until my sister raised the “swollen face” alarm, that I felt it serious. I immediately took to prayers, and prayed as I was taking my bath. When I was done dressing, I went to check my face in the mirror and was surprised at how different I looked. It was not me in the mirror! Anyways, to hide my face from other church members, I wore sunglasses while in church. People kept asking if I had Apollo since they had seen me a day before at a church member’s wedding, bright faced and okay. I had to go to the doctor’s in between service. I was diagnosed of an allergy, given drugs, injection(it was almost a battle o. I almost cried. I really do hate injections), and a cream to apply. My face went down later that day but the problem that still exists is we do not know what caused the allergy. So now I know I am allergic to something but what it is, still remains unknown.

MANY THOUGHTS ON MY MIND

There honestly are a thousand and one thoughts on my mind. Topping the list is how I will do my internship amidst this looming ASUU strike. The Academic Staff Union of Universities, Nigeria is on strike for reasons I honestly don’t care for. However, the strike seems to be a blessing for me as the Nhef internship offered to me is to begin by 4th of September. I would have had to miss classes and some things in school but for the strike. However, ASUU being unpredictable may call off the strike at any time and that in itself is the cause of my apprehension. But I know that all things work together for my good.

In the midst of all these experiences, the devil tried to lie to me and make me feel bad. He wanted me to change my confession but God saw me through it all, teaching me to trust in His word regardless, to fix my gaze on his promises and to never relent in faith. I still battle my fight of faith but I know that in all these, I am more than a conqueror.

I have learned that usually in life, life interrupts your plans and things rarely ever go as planned.

I pray you have a great week as the week continues and I wish above all things that your faith doesn’t fail.

IYAWO

Like sperm cells
Fighting to meet with the egg
You are caught in the web
Of competition,
A case of survival
Of the fittest.
You rally,
Bid, vye-
For the position
Of ‘iyawo’.
You have been told
You are the side chick
You know it
But yet, choose to persevere,
To withstand,
To endure:
Thinking that
Perhaps,
Someday,
You will be crowned
With a ring
Having fully passed
The test of loyalty
To a man
Who thinks he is king.
Someday, you’ll be broken hearted
You will sit
and cry
and laugh
And wail
At the fact
That you delayed
In moving on
While aiming for the coveted position
“IYAWO”.

©Opara Chizaram Adaobi

Kindly put in a comment and read other posts. You’d definitely be glad you did.

©Opara Chizaram 2017

Knocked out but back stronger!

Hurrrrrrray people! Look who’s back! Meeeeeeeeeeee! Lol. I hope I’m not the only one excited that I’m back from my long writing sabbatical.

Okay, so the story goes thus:
I have been down with writer’s block.:'(:'(:'(

Sad, init? Such a short sad story. And so I wanted to write for you all but writer’s block kept me back. I didn’t want to come here to rant alone.

And a whole lot has happened in the course of the space of time I’ve been away. I made it into the NHEF scholars class of 2017!!! People have been asking what that entails. It just gives me a platform for internship with the best firms in the country.

Can you believe I met Kemi Adeosun? Yes I did. The very minister of finance. She happens to be sister in law to the boss of Kuraimo Capital, the company that runs the NHEF program.
The program was insightful and beautiful. I cannot even say it all here at once.

image
I should've cut the picture. Laziness caused this. Had to screenshot it

But when the good news comes about the firm I’ll be interning with, I’ll be sure to keep you all informed.

However, I need suggestions on how to make this blog better. I need to know what interests you when you read my posts…is there something more I should add? Something I should cut back on?
Just drop your comment in the comment box.

In the meantime, I’m learning French too. I also would begin chess lessons next week courtesy Preshylala.

Wish me well.

Kindly put in a comment and read other posts. You’d definitely be glad you did.

©Opara Chizaram 2017